Picture Credits – Jeannie Selda
“Nobody needs to agree with how you feel for you to be right for yourself. Knowing something is right for you right now and at this time in your journey is enough. If you wait for someone else to agree. it might take you forever to make an important choice.”
– Jennifer Hough
Your heart’s knowing matters so much.
When you marry someone, marry because you “know” somehow that they are a worthy playmate on this imperfect adventure called Life.
When you stay with someone, stay because your deepest intuition feels a “YES!,” whether you feel great or even when something feels off. Then be mindful of your own mood, take space when you need it, and have important conversations when possible. That’s why mastering your own clarity on your journey is so important.
When you separate/divorce from someone, do so not because you are against the other person, do so FOR yourself, your journey and your enrichment. They will do what they will do, but at least they will be free from your disdain, and therefore they stand a chance to see their part on this journey. Otherwise, they will simply collect evidence against you out of protection.
“You are a conscious being with choice,” says my friend, Satyen Raja.
When you find a new job, say “yes” because it resonates with YOUR soul. Be an expert at understanding your soul’s yearnings.
When you leave a job, do so without collecting evidence that the company or its staff is bad or wrong. People are always fallible. Do the same in a relationship; leave because it’s time. Let yourself be called to your next journey, and find the freedom in what you DID get from that journey. As a result, more events to be grateful for will find you in your next journey.
This is YOUR journey, not anyone else’s… enjoy it, stay humble, and communicate where you are with courage.
You have your emotional responses to events and people; they are mostly based on the past. Don’t take them so seriously. Someone else might have a totally different perspective. It doesn’t make them wrong.
Nobody needs to agree with how you feel, for you to be right for yourself. Knowing something is right for you right now, in this situation, and at this time in your journey, is enough. If you wait for someone else to agree, it might take you forever to make an important choice.
In a year, you may have a new perspective and need to make a new choice. That’s life.
Let yourself be uncomfortable. Comfort has nothing to do with doing what is aligned and congruent.
I’ve been divorced; I’ve found love; and I’ve seen people leave due to misunderstandings that could have been cleared up. I’ve had jobs and clients who were not aligned choices. I’ve had amazing connections that didn’t last, and I’ve been out of alignment with my own heart many times. I’ve felt super weak, insecure and thought that I was perfectly okay at the time… only to find out later I was being a dufus (I say affectionately).
I’m doing my best though. Life keeps humbling me. It’s the contrast that makes it all juicy.
Understanding that contrast and clarity are part of the fabric of how it works relieved me of the perfectionism to get it right. I no longer aim for perfection; I aim for fulfillment and meaning. I aim for richness of experience and contribution. I aim for the deepest truth I can live, knowing what I know… without judging another. There but for the grace of God I go, always.
I am deeply grateful for the blessings that continue to show up despite, and sometimes because of, my clear fallibility. All I can do is my best, given my conditions. And then I learn.
I’ve learned that entangling with other people, seeking approval, or trying not to be disliked, takes me away from my passion. Being right about someone else’s fallibility takes me away from my passion, too. And right now, we need all the people with authentic heart-driven passion to lean in without the filters. Less distraction, more of You and me, please. Less news, more solutions. Less me, more we.
And that’s where I am today.
Might be different tomorrow…
With compassion and support for your passion and journey.
